We Booped a Moon

When your eye hits a moon and you make it go phoon, that's amore

September 27th, 2022

Yesterday NASA did a historic space boop, crashing its Double Asteroid Redirection Test spacecraft into Dimorphos, a “moonlet orbiting the near-Earth asteroid Didymos,” which it kept claiming “poses no threat to Earth” but did look kind of shifty, don’t you think? Marco Inaros swore revenge on “da innas,” and Google made a thing.

Today in yesterday, I am assured by Canadians that they know Tim Hortons isn’t very good, which is a credit to their honesty, and also that the Sable Island horses came through Hurricane Fiona just fine. Would that it ‘twere the same for Tampa forty eight to seventy two hours from now, but currently meteorologists are calling Hurricane Ian a “potential historic catastrophe.”

And speaking of historic catastrophes, somehow there’s more “Don’t Worry Darling” news? Now that the film has come out, Lainey Gossip reports there was:

…a “loud” disagreement between Pugh and Wilde on set late into production. And Wilde would, indeed, “disappear” from set, aligning with times when no one could locate Harry Styles…

…it is believed to be the major source of Pugh’s ire that Wilde would be “unpresent”, and Pugh, already stressed, would grow tired of waiting and ask that they just start filming without Wilde. Everyone has their pages, they know what scene they’re shooting, Libatique and the first assistant director would know the shots Wilde wants, so they would proceed without Wilde, who would then breeze in and “take over” without acknowledging Pugh keeping them on track. Chris Pine apparently backed Pugh every time she asked to simply start without Wilde. Reportedly, Pine is firmly Team Miss Flo, factor that into Phantom Spitgate however you may. 

This makes a lot more sense than “Pugh was mad Olivia Wilde was having an affair with Harry Styles” because why would she care? Why do I care? What can I say…

Remember the New Jersey deli that had a $100 million market cap last year? Yeah that was fraud. The Try Guys Try: Infidelity. And ‘Istoric Catastrophes, Guv (U.K. Edition): Liz Truss, Liz Truss and… Liz Truss.

Thinky: “Has The Zodiac Killer Mystery Been Solved (Again)?” Aaron Gell wrote about yet another Zodiac Killer suspect, one even more plausible than Ted Cruz. Andrea Long Chu on “The Mixed Metaphor” of mixed-Asian-American-ness in the books of Celeste Ng and Jay Caspian Kang.

It’s worth noting that, at the end of the day, Ng and Kang actually agree that racial identity can be bought only through racism; they are merely, to quote the old joke, haggling over the price.

And hey remember John Herrman, formerly of BuzzFeed and The Awl, last seen slowly drowning in the New York Times editorial tarpits? He’s escaped to NY Mag and started writing about the internet again—here he is on why Tiktok might feel compelled to awkwardly copy “BeReal, a French photo app that barely works.” We missed you, pal.

MSCHF is selling a lot of keys to one car, for just $19 each. You can call 1-337-539-4255 to find out where the car is. As I write this, the car is parked at the corner of Ketcham St. and Pettit Ave. in Queens, NY, and I am 100% positive that someone reading this right now could walk over there and find it. If you had a key you could just drive it away, and then come pick me up and we’ll go on history’s most precarious road trip.

And did Trevor Jacob crash a plane for YouTube views? Almost certainly yes, but this Vice profile, while it doesn’t definitively answer the question,1 does reveal a lot more depth to Jacob's life and backstory than "YouTube bro who crashed a plane for clout" would imply.

Today’s Song: Wheatus, “Teenage Dirtbag”

~ The greatest gift any true Belter could wish for is to die fighting for the tabs ~

Thank you all for the book recs yesterday. Readers suggested that Stacy Schiff’s “Cleopatra: A Life,” Ford Madox Ford’s Fifth Queen trilogy, and “Death of the Fox” by George Garrett might scratch that Bruce Duffy / Hilary Mantel itch, so I pass them along to you without any firsthand confirmation.

Oh and buy a shirt, would you? Thank you ever so much. You’ll enjoy it.

Reply

or to participate.